Perfectionism is Enough to Kill
image ripped from, http://www.vectordiary.com
You may not know it, or maybe you do know it and I’m the one who is learning this, but I am a perfectionist. And let me tell you, it is a disease. It causes me a lot of anxiety. I am working on a research presentation for my molecular biology class, and I get quite frustrated with myself because I waste a lot of time trying to “get it perfect”. I’ve tried to cast aside perfectionism. In a lot of scenarios, I think I do a pretty good job. well, actually here’s the thing about being a perfectionist, if I can’t do it perfectly then I won’t do it at all. There are plenty of aspects of my life where that holds true. I wont run through the list, it might get depressing. So, the best thing I can do is say “forward! Just keep trudging through it, Faye!” It doesn’t help that I’m highly distracted too. Oh! You are learning a lot about me in THIS post! LOL Here is my abstract-in-progress. It hasn’t been edited or spell checked yet and there are several explanations yet to be included, but at least you get an idea of what I’ve been learning/studying. 
“Optically active reduced carbonyl compounds are highly desirable in pharamceutical settings. They are, however, difficult and costly to achieve in the laboratory setting under synthetic conditions. Optically active compounds are best achieved through naturally derived mechanisms. Aldo-keto reductases (akr) can produce the reduced carbonyl compounds that are used in pharmaceuticals. The structure of aldo-keto reductases affects their stereoselectivity. By altering the structure of aldo-keto reductases, desired stereo-isomers can be synthesized. Mutagenesis was performed on ydl124w, an aldo-keto reductase isolated from Saccharomyces cerevisiae, commonly known as baker’s yeast. The structure of ydl124w is not yet known. In order to better understand the structure of ydl124w, and also to modify the stereoselective outcome of its product, mutagenesis was performed. The genetic sequence of ydl124w was aligned with human aldose reductase, a structurally known enzyme. Human aldose reductase, as with ydl124w, is enzymatically dependent on the binding of NADPH near its enzymatic region. Residues of ydl124w were analyzed at 7 angstroms radial distance from the NADPH binding site. Residues S159, N160, F161 were selected for alanine substitution based on their highly conserved nature across several members of the akr family……”
Being a perfectionist does have a downside, but in situations where your work is compared to others–the higher quality product will pay off for you in the long-run. So, I say don’t push the thoughts away too far. hang in there.
Regarding your study material: I would need to use a dictionary feverishly to make it through the first two sentences.
Yes, it definitely has pluses and minuses. There are several areas of my life where I’ve learned to just “let go”, which is really refreshing.
It’s funny, while composing my research poster I felt a little silly, but gosh now when I reread it, it looks as though I’ve learned a few things this semester!
“It’s funny, while composing my research poster I felt a little silly, but gosh now when I reread it, it looks as though I’ve learned a few things this semester!”
I hope I feel the same way about parenting when I reflect on the experience a few years from now. I hope your exams are done…
I think i could somewhat understand that if i actually tried to read all the way through! Good for you girl.
While I was reading what you wrote about perfectionism it all rang true for me as well. maybe thats one of the reasons we are such good friends. some things do come easily for me and have since i was a kid, so i just expect that i should be exceptionally great at everything and can be very hard on myself. its good in a way because we have high standards and expectations for ourselves, but we have to learn how to be patient and kind to ourselves and realize we are works in progress.