Learning to Let Go
Since my divorce I have finally learned to let go of perfection. It has been a long emotional journey, but one that I am proud of. During my marriage I was fairly uptight, forced that way by a tyrannical partner. I was expected to maintain my house to such perfection that Donna Reed would have looked like a damned hippy. I believed that a tidy house was a reflection of who I was on the inside. I thought that people might judge my character or integrity or status based on whether my home looked like a Pottery Barn catalog. And guess what? I was wrong. (well, I suppose you didn’t have to guess that part. You probably saw it coming). As long as I was married I was empty on the inside. Dead. And if I were dead, then my home was simply a really clean and tidy coffin.
Over the past 2 years I have had to re-shift my focus on what is most important in life. With such a busy schedule, I have had to decide where my hours and time are most worth spending. My children need me more than they need sorted and folded laundry. I would rather spend their wakeful hours reading aloud The Lorax, or watching Cars for the 110th time. Now even on the weekends when they are visiting with their dad I have let go of hurrying to catch up on the week’s chores. The chores will get done with time. What I need is rest and downtime so I can get up and tackle my monday again.
Cheers to NOT being productive!
